B*rry B*nds, aka Barry Bonds
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G**d W*rk B*rry.
T** B*d the F*ns B** Y*u When You Hit H*me Runs. *

* Good Work Barry.
Too Bad the Fans Boo You when you hit Home Runs.
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Our studiobonton embedded sports reporter has followed the record setting homers of this batting leader of our time. Not THE leading batter, just a batting leader. Always taking away recognition of the achievements of Barry; he will always have an asterisk. B*rry B*nds, aka Barry Bonds

Sample of no-asterisk home run batters:
Hank Aaron's 755, Babe Ruth's 714, Willie Mays's 660, Frank Robinson's 586, Harmon Killebrew's 573, Reggie Jackson's 563

Rumor has it that Barry has been juicing with a then undetectable performance-enhancing steroid called Tetrahydrogestrinone, which BALCO marketed as "the cream" and "the clear." Coinciding with the timing of the charges, Bonds went up two hat sizes! Know any other 30-plus year old heads that have grown two hat sizes?

Fans this season enjoy booing Bonds each time he comes to bat. Hundreds of asterisk signs (*) have been confiscated at the gates of ballparks, as directed by the Commissioner of Baseball, as any protests of the integrity of the homers would temper the fervor of the record setting.

“Only one player could be voted to start the All-Star Game and be booed in every stadium besides his own. Bonds can divide opinion, even within the same at-bat. He is often booed when he walks to the plate and cheered when he trots around the bases.” - July 9 NY Times

Barry Bonds has made no effort to become less disparaged, he’s the most aloof player in the game – aloof as in cold, remote. Not like a focused and uncomfortably famous Ted Williams, more like a brat of a man that can’t handle his position.

Many fans and the press consider Bonds “a crummy human.” In the early 1990s his divorce proceedings included testimony of Bonds kicking his wife in the *ss. Not the most shocking-ever divorce court transcript, but the image stuck, “Star athlete kicks wife in *ss at home.”

Regardless, when he hits it, the ball fires off the bat and rises and when gravity begins to grab a normally hit baseball, his hit is still rising. Up, up, arching, out, away, and eventually the hit begins falling back to earth. You just have to see it to believe it. Everyone in the ballpark floats for a moment along with the white ball.

The San Fran ball park Splashdown Zone:

Kayaks and an inflatable target in San Francisco Bay.

Enough of the walks from pitch-outs, pitch to Barry! It won’t really count like a real athletic stat anyway. Let it fly so the fans can float.

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Should we separate the achievements from the shortcomings?
Are we so weak and lowly on the success ladder that we need to cling to upward rungs at any cost? Is relative success much of a success?

And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make.

There's no folded "reserved" card on the table,
but who would risk sitting down at this bench when someone - likely sticking out their elbows and not averse to confrontation - has made a territorial statement under the endorsement of the brand of the night?

This image was taken in July prior to a suds-soaked peel & eat shrimp feast.
Looking around that crowd it was clear how the eatery could make money on some of the dainty diners, but on others, there’s no way they’re making money, some people are really putting away the camaróns.
Oh, wait. The PBR sign reminds me how an all-you-can-eat shrimp place stays ahead - sell longnecks in iced buckets.

It’s all a gluttony fest. More is better, God Bless America.
If one is good, then two must be twice as good, and so twenty are twenty times better than one. Defy the Economic Law of Diminishing Returns!

A big hat embiggens any wearer.
If you got the chutzpa to begin with . . .

I'll be good if it'll just cool off, at least for tonight.